Snap Out of It: Do Something About Your Dreams!

All of us get stuck when trying to take action on our long-term life goals, which can include changing careers, breaking old habits, starting a new business, taking a radical sabbatical, or redefining interpersonal relationships. Fortunately, there are hundreds of ways-many of which are in this book-to define your life goals, mission, and purpose. While identifying your life's mission is indeed an important and tough process, more people actually get stuck trying to implement their dreams.

The good news is that a few simple actions will alleviate the pressure and fear that hold you back. The following steps will nudge you in a positive direction, toward the life you are meant to live.

Step 1: Change Your Attitude and Expectations
To shake yourself out of your stupor and gain some momentum, you must first alter your preconceived notions. Common myths about great achievers often stifle our own success:

Myth: Successful people are naturally gifted, strong, and courageous.
Fact: Most successful people feel terrified-just like you do-when they try something new. Many have average intellect, and most had to struggle to get to their current positions. What separates them from the rest of us is that, despite feeling afraid and insecure, they take action.

Myth: Successful people rarely fail.
Fact: Successful people fail all the time. They simply don't allow the fear and disappointment of failure prevent them from trying again.

Keep these facts in mind and create a realistic expectation of what it will take to implement your dreams. Before you begin the remaining steps, help yourself by adjusting your attitude:
  • View your journey as a spiritual adventure. French philosopher Pierre Teilhard de Chardin once said: "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience." In these terms, your human struggles are vital to your growth as a spiritual being. In fact, they may be the only paths to major life breakthroughs.
  • Fail often-and enjoy it! High standards and a track record of accomplishment are wonderful additions to a resume. Unfortunately, if you apply these standards to a radically new life goal, they will absolutely paralyze you. In order to avoid paralysis, you must expect that you will struggle and fail.
Action: Reflect on your own spiritual path, whatever that may be. What is important to you? What do you hope to contribute to the world during your time on earth? Why do you think you were brought here? How does your life goal fit into this plan?

Keep these answers in mind if you get frustrated or discouraged as you follow the next steps. Your ability to persevere will depend to a great extent on the way you perceive your journey.

Step 2: Work Backwards

It is often difficult to imagine how you will get from where you are today to where you want to be in the next three to five years. The types of jobs that interest you may require experience that you lack. Perhaps you need more cash or credit than is currently available to open your own business. Or maybe your current employer does not offer the six-month sabbatical required for you to produce an independent film.

Many people freeze in this phase and throw their hands up in resignation. To overcome these barriers, you must get extremely concrete with what it will take to realize your life goals. Identify the specific skills, information, resources, and contacts you will need to for future success, and then work backwards to your present position. Now you can create a specific action plan.

Action: Create a profile that describes exactly what it will take to bring your vision to a reality. Consider the following needs:
  • Skills - knowledge, experience, information;
  • Equipment - infrastructure, software, supplies, raw materials;
  • Money - start-up and maintenance costs;
  • People - influential mentors, partners, suppliers.
Which of these skills can you develop in your current job or life situation? (Remember, volunteer activities are an excellent-and free-way to develop skills!) How can you begin to obtain the equipment, money, contacts, or information that you need? If you are not very clear on exactly what you need to succeed, you will never get there.

Step 3: Create Positive Consequences for Your Actions
Once you identify a task you need to complete to reach your life goal, you may realize that your actions lack immediate positive results. Often, doing something you deem necessary to achieving your greatness can be painful, excruciating, frightening, and generally unpleasant!

Whenever you try something new or difficult, huge waves of fear and self-doubt often surface. This "Death Spiral of Doom" announces its approach with a loud, sucking noise. As it pulls you down a dark, spinning hole, every negative comment you have ever heard rushes through your head:

"Who do you think you are?"
"No one from your background has ever made it in this business!"
"Why would anyone ever pay to listen to you?"
This force is so strong that at the slightest sign of discomfort, you sprint back to safe ground-which usually means stopping dead in your tracks. In order to overcome this extremely powerful emotion, you must create positive consequences, reinforcements, and rewards for accomplishing tasks.

The results of accomplishing your goal are your positive consequences. For instance, if you open a successful restaurant, what will happen?
  1. You will work with fresh, fragrant food all day.
  2. You will use your imagination to create interesting dishes.
  3. You will never again wear nylons to work in a gray cubicle!
For reinforcements, seek out trainers, coaches, support groups, therapists, family, and friends who provide ideas, encouragement, and feedback as you undertake your adventure. They should be available as soon as you hear the sucking sound of the Death Spiral of Doom. Also, make sure to provide yourself with rewards. For instance, if you write the first draft of your business plan, take yourself snowboarding for the weekend. Rewards need not be big; they must simply be timely and meaningful to you.

Action: Draw three columns on a piece of paper. In the first column, write your long-term goal. In the second column, describe the positive and negative consequences of accomplishing your goal. If you succeed, what will be the results? What if you do not succeed? In the third column, identify specific rewards to ensure positive consequences. This step is crucial! If you fail to incorporate these reinforcements into your plan, you greatly increase your chances of returning to paralysis.

Step 4: Surround Yourself with People You Admire
Whom do you admire? Whose life looks like the one you want to have? In order to accomplish your dreams, surround yourself with people who do the kinds of things to which you aspire.

Do not talk yourself out contacting someone you admire by saying, "He's too busy," or "She's too important." People love to talk about themselves! They appreciate acknowledgement of their expertise or positive lifestyle. Many people will gladly spend fifteen minutes speaking with you or answering an e-mail. If all goes well, you may even find future opportunities to correspond. By identifying and surrounding yourself with people you admire, you are much more likely to accomplish your life goals.

Action: Brainstorm a list of people you know-and don't know-who are outstanding in your field of interest. What do you hope to learn from them? If they were sitting in front of you, what would you ask?

Next, identify where these people hang out. Do they attend conferences or speak publicly? If you have the opportunity to meet them, request a few minutes of their time and ask the questions that you prepared. Otherwise, track down an e-mail address and send a note.

You will be amazed at how willing people are to spend time with you. And if they aren't … they may not be the best people to connect with anyway! Over time, you will develop a strong circle of positive, accomplished friends and mentors who will help you achieve your goals.

Step Five: Do Something-Anything-Right Now!
Enough of the analyzing, prioritizing, making lists, and gathering your reinforcements! Spending more time in the planning phase will actually decrease your energy and momentum. Now is the time to take a step towards your dream!

Action: Pick up your notes. Choose one item on the list-even a very small task-and DO IT. Make a phone call, create a spreadsheet, or look up something on the web. The key here is action, not perfection. Once you begin accomplishing tasks related to your life goals, you will feel a power surge of energy!

Go For It!

Everyone struggles with fear when trying something new. You are not alone. By following these simple steps, you can knock yourself out of the paralysis and actually see your dreams become reality. Enjoy your adventure!

This article is reprinted from Create the Business Breakthrough You Want: Secrets and Strategies from the World's Greatest Mentors, Mission Publishing © 2004.

And yes, it was my first published article!
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All the best,

-Pam

Pamela Stewart
Ganas Consulting
1155 S. Power Road, Suite 114
PMB 110
Mesa, AZ 85206
480-663-3252
pcs@ganas.com
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